Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Why I have not blogged...

I have not blogged in some time for two reasons:

1) I have not felt the need to blog since my depression went into remission। Remember, I started the blog in Mexico as a way of enduring my trials, having white space in which to order my thoughts about my experience. Later, it became a therapeutic aid to enduring depression, to such a an extent that Kathleen and close friends questioned whether it was actually extending my depression by reinforcement; that, happily, was not true. In writing about my chemical distress I was able to objectify my diseased feelings during the act of writing and thus obtain some temporary relief by means of my blog. The comments were helpful, too. The contact. The affirmation. It was a discipline I practiced in order to hang onto some sort of stated reality, which you suffered with me when I wrote well.

2) I have run into discouraging technical problems and don't know how to fix them. When I post at my blog now, any change at the posting itself results in a translation into an unknown language whose script reminds me of Cambodian, though it is not Cambodian. How such a glitch developed is beyond me.

It has never been about numbers, but since I stopped blogging, visitors have dropped only 25% because of the long tail of references I left behind in former posts, so that searchers looking for a quote from Churchill or details on Freud's vasectomy unwittingly enter my blog space.

Only two close friends questioned why I wasn't blogging; I told them I no longer felt the need. I have contemplated a new blog to rid myself of the present glitches in this one, a blog dedicated to joy as in my last post, a place of hope where there was darkness. If you want to see such a blog, please comment.
Meanwhile I have been gardening, performing music, writing poetry, volunteering as a docent at The Botanical Gardens, leading music therapy at a ministry for the homeless and mentally ill, attending men's groups and debating poetry at various forums, where I defend Eliot again among other things। I've also been nursing Kathleen, who has suffered a gum infection from a botched root canal that also plunged her into a depression. She is a unipolar, I'm a bipolar. That doesn't mean her depression doesn't scare me, but I keep whistling through the graveyard of life. I'm confident enough to support her, as she did me for two years. As for bloviating online, here are links to recent discussions in which I play a primary role: �

Lost in the Shallows,� a discussion of contemporary verse

Defending Eliot at Babilu Forum

Critique thread at Alsop's Gazebo

Recent publications, including YouTube (posted before):






All for now, I fear the quasi-Cambodian interpreting ghost at my typing fingers' heels.

Two Kilobunnies,



  1. I'm very glad you have significantly improved. But don't let that stop you from blogging.

  2. Anonymous11:27 PM PDT

    Good to see you blogging again -- I liked your post over on Silliman's blog re Hawkey's book. I've read both the one reviewed by Silliman and Hawkey's first book, The Book of Funnels, which I think in some ways is the better of the two. Your comments were on the mark for me, though I think Hawkey -- if he develops -- could be a great poet. In his poetry I get a sense of a lot of "masking" of a more straightforward, sorrowful lyricism, kind of like James Wright done in the manner of the post avant garde.

    Gary Sloboda

  3. Thanks, hedgie. I visited your blog and left a note.

    Gary, thanks. Now that I've come out of my depression I don't have a need to blog, but since some are interested in my continuing, it shouldn't be too much trouble. And Silliman's Blog as well as Gazebo Theory and Practice are good places for debates in contemporary poetry. I think after many years of such debates I have become more politic. My goal is to be loveable Teflon. Fat chance!

    Speakng of "masking," the new SCR (Shit Creek Review) is on masks (I didn't make it in) and at the Gazebo's "Calls for Submissions" there's a new magazine called "Conclave" that is soliciting "persona" poems.

    I have good news I will post today.



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